While I was in seminary, I remember reading a number of articles on birth order as it related to responsibility, roles within normal family organization, and the way birth order impacts couples in marriage. As the youngest of three children, I would read through those articles and see which ideas seemed to make sense from my perspective. As I examined those theories, I thought some to be complete rubbish, though I knew I was prejudiced and viewed myself in a better light than reality indicated.
Immediately after Jesus and His disciples ate their last meal together, the disciples got into an argument over which one of them was the greatest, a rather petty debate given the timing of it. In the midst of ending this conversation over greatness, Jesus tells His disciples that “the greatest among you should be like the youngest, and the one who rules like the one who serves.” These words probably struck the twelve as incredibly counterintuitive, even though the disciples had watched Jesus put those same ideas into action over the previous three years. Why would the ruler be the one who served? Why would the greatest one act as though he would inherit little and have no part in the decision-making process of the family?
As I read the words from this passage, I see them in conjunction with what Jesus said in the fifteenth chapter of John: “Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” The life of the Christian is one where we are called to place ourselves as secondary (or tertiary) to others. But this role does not come naturally to us. Usually we want to be in charge and see ourselves at the center of our existence. We need the daily (and often hourly) reminder that Jesus has called us to flip our understanding and try to become more like those who serve.
On my computer monitor in our home office, I have a Post-it note that reminds me of this calling. It reads quite simply, “God first, others second, me last.”